MCDONALDS MADE ME FAT!!!

My diet has been fairly healthy and I always cut down all the junk food but for 2 months or so I would say I found myself going in to McDonalds way more than I have all my life and well you might say this is an excuse but every time I have to meet my “friend” we seem to meet there and well to be honest its never because im hungry or anything but more so it’s the only comfortable place around town to catch up with people I mean yes there are plenty of benches and cafes around but coffee shops are always overpriced and stupidly I rather spend £6 on a meal than to spend £3 for a coffee. But of course in terms of health wise the meal is doing more bad to me than the overpriced coffee. So along these months I actually started eating less and when I say less I mean less. I used to eat like a man who’s having a feast every single meal but now I take in more fruits and vegetables but then I noticed that I was actually gaining a lot of weight and actually gained over 5kg just by eating McDonalds so from now on im going to stop eating from there as hard as it might be I can’t carry on like this. It’s quite shocking how easy they make it to consume bad food! I mean a healthy meal could cost you way more than junk. Im not surprised so many people are overweight and unhealthy.

CHEAP MAKE-UP BRUSHES

The brushes- now since they are synthetic its actually harder for power products to stick but for its prize I would say it works pretty well but I don’t have any decent brushes to compare them to so obviously you get what you pay for. But it seems to blend the sleek blush wonderfully and it works well for both natural look as well as heavy on the blush look too. It’s extremely soft but the bristles aren’t sturdy at all unlike my stippling brush by Samantha chapman which the bristles are very sturdy but this is densely packed. The package seems quite sturdy and looks very classy with gold detail and black handle. I wish the set came with an eyeliner brush but it didn’t so that’s quite disappointing. Most brushes are for face and I’m finding it quite useful since all I have is a foundation brush. The eye shadow brushes are good and they seem to blend well but once again I find them to be too big but it’s manageable.  

http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00KIFBO20/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o02_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Let me tell you a story - Being lonely in a world with million people…

Imagine a young girl who was bright and her future was almost planned out and with everyone thinking she’ll achieve greatness. She wasn’t from the richest of family infact her biggest worry was not having a dad not because  she wanted a dad but she hated the feeling of being treated in a different way all because she didn’t have a dad because to her there was only one person she needed in life and that was her grandmother , to her she was the mother who was strict if she didn’t work hard enough but she was also the one told me that I could achieve greatness and she believed in her and she understood all her feelings and was the only person who was on the same page as her. You see growing up her mother was only seen as her sister because she married too young and was still growing up. For some reason she was always too naïve and trusted everyone so when the girl was growing up she soon realized it was her duty to look after her mother because of what her dad did to her in her eyes all men were creatures that you had to avoid and she saw her mum as a easy victim and she had to look after her so instead of being a child she had to grow up too quickly to her falling in love was the worst thing you could do. She was always pushed to work hard by her grandmother and her mother supported her and took her to every tuition class but there was always a gap between her mum and her and it seemed her mother never realized it. When she looks back now she was given love and affection without having to ask for it but now she doesn’t have anyone around that she could ask for.

 Then this devil of a man came into her world one day when she got back from school she saw the ugliest cycle she has ever seen on the poach and she had a gut feeling that whoever was in the house right now is a bad person and she knew something is going to change and few days later he would become her step farther and the world around her started to crumble. He was never sweet or generous like anyone from her family but he was always putting money to the front and even from the start he made her feel unwanted. On the first day they stayed at a house with what was her new family and the first he did was make her sleep in a closed tent while her mum and he slept outside , if you ever known the feeling of being suffocated that how it felt like but did she realize that was just a taster for the rest of her life and she suffers from claustrophobia and cant even sleep in  room.

He was from another country and they had to move away from the one person she loved most in the world and from a small family she wished so long she wouldn’t have to she had the feelings in her gut this would be the end of her happiness, but she wanted her mum to be happy since she married at 19 and divorced by 23 she wanted a man to look after her and she wanted her to be happy and didn’t want  to hold her back since all her life she was told it the was the girls fault that her father had left since according to her birth sign she’s not meant to have a father. She grew up knowing she was the reason for her mums sadness and this was the only chance. As soon as they arrived to his country there was never a day without drama and he picked on her for every little thing. She wanted help for her to be the smart girl that she was used to but in a another environment she had to teach herself to learn English and no one ever believed in her and the only person who always did she left behind and as days, weeks moths years passed her grandmother grew older and she couldn’t burden her with the pain so she pretended everything was okay and that they were happy but there wasn’t a day where he picked on her he would say anything and always told her she was worthless and when she grows up and married someone he would use her for sex and leave her because she wasn’t worth anything,, she wasn’t used to being treated like this then her mum became pregnant and they couldn’t get away from him then came a time where he would be nice to her if she took his side and stood against mum and so she did she thought if she made him happy then they won’t end up divorcing her mum and could be happy. Then one night as she laid between her mum and him he put his penis in her hand and made her hold it and as her mum left to the toilet he would put his fingers inside her panties and finger her with his rough fat fingers; you see she has been sexually abused in the past before by cousin and she never told anyone because at that age she thought it was her fault he was doing this and she was to blame and she felt dirty and thought maybe she’s one of those whore that liked these kind of feelings and didn’t want to tell anyone and be looked at by people as the victim . in her eyes they were only doing this because she didn’t have a father figure in her life to stand up for her so she was an easy victim . this guy who sexually abused her was supposed to be the father that she yearned for but instead she got him. She never focused on studies and wasted time on things that would make her happy temporarily so she can forget the pain and ended up getting just average grades in school and she couldn’t get into the course in college that she wanted to, ever since she was younger she wanted to be a doctor and so she wasted two years not doing well in college and ended up not going into university.

You see as soon as she turned 18 he told her she had to leave the house , yeah he look her away from everything she had then abandoned her. For years he been telling her he would physically kick her out. The last ever conversation she had with him was when he told her he would grab her by the hair on to the street and beat her with a brick, do  you know how 18 year old girls heart would be if someone who was supposed to look after her said that. So she decided to get help from the college she went to and get help and moved into a housing projects for homeless youths then she started into another college hoping to do well and change her life around. But do you know how hard it is to live by yourself and cook, look after yourself at that age with no help and on top of all this she had to pretend to her grandma she was still at home happy and to her mother she had t portray an independent girl who got out and was now happy do you know how much it breaks your heart? Do you have any idea at all? Now she started to loose herself and turned into something she despised and now she wishes her mum would understand when shes quite with a blank look on her face rather than say she was being moody. She wished for her mum to understand her the way grandma did but she wasn’t grandma and it seems like she still hasn’t finished growing up and her daughter is almost giving up on life.  The girl hopes to find something that would make her happy even if its temporary while she recover her lost life but it seems like god not on her side and I hope she waits a little bit longer and doesn’t give up.

What would you want this girl to do now?  Should she just not see her mum and cope on her own ?

Eating with a chopstick

I don’t know how or why I wanted to start eating with a chopstick, but I think me being obsessed with Korean movies play a factor in this and I know that it’s very practical too I mean you can use a chopstick for pretty much anything. So as my first try on eating with them was quite successful and to be honest I don’t think you can learn how to use them and it pretty much just being comfortable while using them. I got mine from amazon and here’s the link. Im not connected with this seller but it was the cheapest one I found and it came from china and I received my item within 7 days which was reasonable as it came from china. I highly recommend the seller. They were very affordable and there are 5 pairs so the whole family can use it and I would say it’s made out of plastic but not the same kind as like a bottle but more sturdy. It won’t break for sure trust me I tested J it’s very easy to handle and its embroided with gold details and it looks very classy and traditional.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00EE1U9G6/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o05_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

First ever MAC products!!!

Where I live there isn’t a mac store and the closest one is an hour drive and even when you get there just like every other mac stores its overcrowded and the staffs pretty much ignores everyone and pretend they are busy saving the world. So it was last Tuesday night I ordered two things online just wanting to try out their products. I purchased the ‘matte lipstick in SO CHAUD’ and fluid line eye-liner gel in BLACK TRACK.

So let’s start off with delivery service- I placed an order on Tuesday night and I received it Friday morning which was very impressive and not only that I was worried about not being happy with the products and not being able to return it. But it comes with a free return stamp sort of thing and the envelope bag it came in was resalable so if you were to return it just stick the return sticker reseal and you’re sorted.

The product itself - So like I mentioned I have never had experience with mac products but I was actually impressed. But the thing is on the website the colour of the lipstick seemed like a brownish nude and I wanted a lipstick that I could wear everyday bases and one that would be close to my natural lip colour. I had even done research on YouTube and everyone described the colour as a nude but when I opened it I was surprised to finding it orange. I would say it’s like a deep orange and has tint of red. When I tried it on it first I wasn’t sure but later I found that it compliments my yellow undertones very well. So if you have olive skin tone or yellowish skin tone this would look really great. I heard from other youtubers that the lipstick was quite drying and I agree it really extenuate chapped lips so when I use it I put towel under the hot water and then gently rub it on my lips in a circular motion then apply lip balm and then after removing the excess I would apply the lipstick. The longevity is good I suppose since it doesn’t claim to be long lasting you can’t complain but it does come off when you eat or drink coffee.

As for the black eyeliner I was quite surprised by its texture since the only gel eyeliner I have used before this was Maybelline which feels quite thick and heavy but this feels so soft and very creamy and gives a really good dark colour and you don’t get the heavy feeling at all. It applies quite smoothly.  Only negative thing is for the price you are paying I would’ve expected to come with a brush but it didn’t so you had to buy one.

Cheaper alternative- Maybelline, but take in mind what I said about the texture and it also dries off and then becomes hard to apply but the brush it comes with is very good. But take in mind its £10 so u might as well bite the bullet and get the mac product.

If you guys like my makeup reviews then do let me know and tell me what you want me to test out next.

How to get a "super brain"...

So my most searched question on google is “how can you improve your brain function” and normally I just get the super foods and exercising and all those that I know will probably work but not enough of a excitement for me to do and as for the exercising I keep wanting to start it but never seem to be getting around to it. But today I hit the jackpot and I came a webite called the www.thefeelgoodlifestyle.com which was written by phil. Drolet and I was drawn to the title on becoming superhuman.,… I thought heck yes! As long as it doesn’t involve some crazy stunts. As I continued to read this he starts talking about 16 hour fasting- I don’t want to copy what he talks about so im just going to link his page. But its basically when you don’t eat for 16 hours continually and eat at the end of it then continue the cycle. Thankfully you are allowed to consume liquid and the 16 hours can be also included when you are sleeping although sleeping for 16hours is just ridiculous. Some of my friends who fast quite similarity (for religious reasons) and I noticed how clear their skin gets as well as increased energy level and more productivity but as much as I wanted this in the past I couldn’t say no to food. But like I said in the past blogs I want to continue to improve myself so I’m going to give this a go and guess what im going to write everything I go through here and well and I’m going to follow phil who i forgot to say is very handsome and looks good enough to be a superman; well why don’t we all join in this journey and get a step closer to becoming the best version of ourselves.

So my last meal is going to be at 9pm so 16 hours from that is at 3 so I can eat then ,

I think for me it would work best if I ate a large meal when I finish the 16 hours then another one at night few hours before I go to bed. Its my first time trying something like this so hopefully it will work out.

So main things I’m looking forward to is things like –

1. Energy level increasing 
2. Weight loss
3. Increase Productivity
4.  Mental clarity

So this is my thought on our eating habit till today I always thought the whole 1500 calories a day and 5 short meals a day was the perfect way to be in a healthy lifestyle. But now the more I think about it and more articles and blogs we read we have been brainwashed by this lifestyle that’s actually like a caged animal that need to eat in a much timetabled manner. If you think about it the whole calorie controlled life style is just nonsense I mean people in different countries have different eating habit and eat less than us and yet seem to be healthier than us. I think we are too preoccupied by the things like having 5fruits a day, and to have 1500 calories and brain washed by all these juicing ideas. We are not caged animals that need to eat like a being with no common sense in fact I think we are over eating and eating too regularly. 

Love life- so this is an update for you guys so few days ago I wrote about that guy in library and my crazy ass emotions and everything ( if you haven’t read I already read it then come back to this) well I had already mentioned my bad luck with love and well this just seem to be another story to the list. So I gave him two chances to show if does like me or not and well he hasn’t done anything…. So that’s the end of that. Sigh I wish guys came with a instruction manual I never understand them!!

Infidelity does not come from lack of love it comes from lack of RESPECT

Is it wrong for a woman to cheat when she doesn’t get any attention from her husband. Marriage is for better or for worse I get that but woman needs attention, and appreciation from the guys in our life and most importantly we need to be reassured about our looks and maybe it is vain but if the one you marry doesn’t realize how great you are and forgets your qualities then is he worthy of having you. So if another man comes and shows appreciation for all these things should she turn it down and be loyal but be sad and not be fulfilled of her desires or should she go for the man who appreciated her and makes her feel like a woman again. If it’s a duty for a woman to be loyal then it’s the man’s duty to appreciate her and show her she is loved and appreciated.

I think my love or is still quite childish I mean I rather spend a day watching cartoons, animations than to go cinema and when I like someone I never think about intimate stuff you know I just want someone to hold hands and place cute little kisses on the cheek and to watch tv and forcing them to eat weird and wonderful things. I think I’m still quite childish and maybe it’s because I never had these things (well maybe that’s a lie ok I’ll rephrase it) I never had it with someone that I actually liked; it’s always just for the sake of it. Sometimes I just like the feeling of liking someone you know when you just randomly smiling for no reason and then realize it’s because you’re thinking about that someone special or when you hear a story or someone’s telling you something and it reminds you of him or just the excitement your heart feels. Well sometimes that feeling is good enough. I hope you understand what I mean.

 I wish people were like Facebook relationship status and would walk around with tags saying with a partner or not then it would be so much easier. I don’t know if he is single and well by the way he reacted to me it would seem like not but then again you can never be sure of guys right!!.

What's your fantasy....

I have a question to ask you what is your fantasy (not that kind) but like how you would like to meet a guy.  Well I’ll tell you mine first and you tell me yours.

I want to have the setting as a library and I want to be reading or looking for books and I want him to see me through the book shelves and between the books and I want him to slowly come to me and maybe comment about a book and recommend a book to me that I should which should be about love or a cute title and I’ll say ok I’ll read it and when I do I want to find a note in there with a comment or something and I write back on the sheet… and he leave me a title of the book I should read and with everyone there is a note and after a while I finally meet him and well the rest should be …… I know I watch too much romantic movies but come on wouldn’t that just be perfect. I know relationships love isn’t perfect but it would go lot further if the start was set out more perfect.

So now tell me what’s your fantasy and if it has already happened…..or are you still looking

I didn't mean to fall in love,but you made it so easy.

Today my heart fluttered and I could feel my cheeks burning up so fast and I never experienced this before EVER!!!  Not even with previous interests. It was such a wonderful feeling it’s like something filling up inside you and it takes your breath away and you lose control of your face expressions and end up grinning like a Cheshire cat and my eyes smiling! These are the feelings I started blogging for so I can remember all of them. Btw I should mention that I’m still grinning I guess I should give you back up story. He works at a library okay and I haven’t used my town library in years since when I started college we had computer facilities there and I used to love reading and would actually read a book every day but now I don’t have time and well life got harder so I lost interest but yeah I used to be in library all the time and this was like 4 years ago and he is the guy that you had to ask to use a computer for and I was so shy I still am but even worse.  i would sit on the computer front of his desk.

So today I been meaning to get a new library card and well I was sort of hoping we would run into each other and previously I have and this was during exam time so heck did I look bad!! So I wanted to look nice and put makeup on and everything and when I walked in everything looked so different and I was kind of lost and not even after the 4th step I see him and  it made me jump and I walked in smiling like an idiot already then I spent 15 minutes walking around after I had found my book cause I really didn’t want to talk to him then I used the 10 second  rules ( this is when you’re about to do something and your brain thinks of everything that could ever go wrong but this thought process takes 10 seconds so you just do it before the 10 seconds)…. So I was like just do it. I was waiting in the line and I think my brain wasn’t working but he looked at me and goes “oh are you borrowing a book” I didn’t reply and then this woman called and was like oh I’ll serve you ( inside my head I was like YES THANK YOU)

But then she didn’t know how to apply for a new card so he was stood next to her trying to show her you don’t know how I felt I was trying to breathe while trying to control my mouth omg!! It was so difficult. Then he just kept walking around and I made eye contact and he had the same cheesy smile as me#! Cute right. He jokingly goes look how much trouble you’re causing! I was like I know and he said you haven’t been here for a while right (OMG HE NOTCIED) I was like yeah 2 years and we talked a bit. Longest conversation I had with him if not only one conversation. So I said thanks and left.

I know you must be thinking it’s not like he proposed to her and asked to go on a date or anything but sometimes it’s the simple things like what’s the reason for him to remember me after all these years and especially where I used to sit you know it’s just a nice feeling to know that you do leave an impression on people and not easily forgotten especially in these days when your own friends family the people you love forget about you.

High standard or just plain stupid?

As I sit in the bus I see all these people don’t seem to look happy, I mean I know it’s a bit of a statement to make. But I feel like most of us just live just the sake of living. These days I just feel like im drifting along I mean im not all that happy or all that sad.  Being a grown up sucks when you’re a kid you don’t over think anything and live for the moment. I guess I haven’t given up hope yet and hopefully I never will because that’s the only thing that’s keeping me going.

In all these movies that I watch the girls spend so long with the guy they lose the sight of who they really are but at the end when they become independent the guy chases after her. Because what’s more sexy than an independent woman right? But sometimes it’s just nice to have a guy around because after all we are all human and what we seek is a bit of affection from the person we love.

It’s easier not to love since heart breaks hurt so much and you end up destroying part of yourself but why do we still run after it knowing that we are going to hurt?,  is the pain and heart ache is that just as addictive as the feeling of being in love. I can safely say I never been in love; is that out of choice well maybe or I might just be fooling myself by saying I don’t want it. There have been boys who came after me but with my luck it never worked out. Do you ever feel like something was just so close to you that you could almost touch it but in a second it disappears and leaves you thinking what the heck did just happen? Well that’s my feeling all the time.

Some might say I have too much of a high standard but I don’t think I do it’s just hard for me to be 100% interested in someone and trust me when I say I know I’m not a beauty queen or have it all going (well I’m not that bad looking either ) but I know it’s better to say no to someone than to say yes and play with their feelings and it’s not like I haven’t been turned down, maybe not directly but if someone seems interested in you then says we should just be friends well that’s a way of rejection right. Have you ever been rejected? But more importantly have you been in love?  Right now my love life is non-existent and as much as I hate to admit it I think it’s probably for the best because I still need to learn to love myself and if you don’t love yourself then who will.